New supermarket legislation for oldies.

[chrisjw]

I want to see these rules introduced:
1. Only allow them into supermarkets on their own & not mob handed.
2. Confiscate all loose change at the door.
3. Allocate them their own till.
4. Have 'Oldie' lanes painted down the aisles & fine them if they wander out of them.
5. Travelling at less than 1mph within the boundaries of the supermarket initiates instant eviction.
6. Anyone caught using a zimmer frame to be escorted from the premises & confined to 'meals on wheels' at home from that moment on.
7. Restrict 'group chats' involving the weather, doctors visits, ailments, grandchildren or other related subjects to outside of the establishment.
8. All shopping lists carried by said persons, to be in capital letters & minimum 20 font.
9. Introduce a maximum time restriction to peruse the shelves & stipulate one day a week only to do so, with times included.
10. Have the right to introduce additional laws to the above, as & when needed.

[giles]

#icon_rofl#

You'll be old yourself one day Chris. Not that far away in fact.

[Roger]

Define 'oldie' Chris (be very careful )

[alvoram]

Nov 26, 2012 12:22:14 GMT giles said:

You'll be old yourself one day Chris. Not that far away in fact.

But when we're all old well be doing the shopping online

[chrisjw]

After much searching, I think I might have found the solution.............All I need to do now is arrange a few mini buses with the ramps, to ship 'em up there..................

www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/2642925/Supermarket-for-older-people-planned-for-Newcastle.html

[magicma]

Oiy you Chris - you will be an oldie sometime - it's not too far away by the look of you!!!!!!!!!! MMa

[Roger]

Cheeky get is older than me

[Anne (fuzzy)]

Brilliant.

Can I add one that applies to everyone please?

Do not hog the reduced items fridge for ages so no one else get a look in, particularly with a trolley. >

[Raffles]

Nov 26, 2012 17:08:18 GMT Anne (fuzzy) said:

Brilliant.

Can I add one that applies to everyone please?

Do not hog the reduced items fridge for ages so no one else get a look in, particularly with a trolley. >

This really, really gets to me. >

I like a bargain like everyone, but the greed of some people astound me. Was behind a couple of 'mature' ladies at the till, dressed as if they weren't short of a bob or two, and their trolley was crammed full of reduced items. Had spotted them earlier and they cleared the 'reduced' section without even looking at the items, and at least half a dozen others trying to see what was there, but didn't get a chance. I felt sorry for the lad reducing them, this pair then took stuff out of his hands before he could put them on the shelf.

I really hoped their home freezer was full and they got food poisoning!

Edited to add: This is not a dig at 'mature' ladies, the men are just as bad

[Anne (fuzzy)]

It really rattles my cage too Raffles. They always make sure their bl@@dy trolleys are right behind them lengthways so you can't even see what's in there. When I finally do get a look, all that's left is a wilted lettuce, a couple of pots of couscous and piles of smelly fish.
Not forgetting of course the full price items that people have dumped in there and swapped when they've seen the same items reduced.

[OneDay]

couscous always gets reduced, you'd think the supermarket buyers would have got the message by now

[Blownupdolly]

Although i am not old and NO 49 is NOT old! i have to use one of their mobility scooters in the supermarket. I whizz round it faster than Chris could run it I am a speed freak.

I too get really angry with the bargain shelf hoggers. I have a great way of moving them out the way. I run into the back of their ankles making them jump out the way then pull in following that up with a profuse appolgy saying my finger got stuck on the forward button. Works every time!!