A little light humor.

[decoy]

sod it
2 blonds locked out of a car and key is in ignition
one turns to the other and says
hurry up its starting to rain and the roof is down

[fiddles]

Sod it too

The cost of living has now got so bad that my wife is having sex with me
because she can't afford Batteries!

[ronaldo]

or the blond that went to the hardware store for a sheet of sandpaper because she needed a map off the desert

[decoy]

did you hear about the blond that put 14500 batts in her bob(batt operated boyfrend) no
half her street did that night

[ronaldo]

The Lone Rangers last request.



The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian war party.

The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, you are the great Lone Ranger. In honour of the Harvest Festival, you will be executed in three days.

But, before I kill you, I will grant you three requests. What is your first request?"

The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse."

Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger, who whispers in Silver's ear, and the horse gallops away.

Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back.

As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.

The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse, but I will still kill you in two days.

What is your second request?"

The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse.

Silver is brought to him, and he again whispers in the horse's ear.

As before, Silver takes off across the plains and disappears over the horizon.

Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a voluptuous brunette, even more attractive than the blonde.

She enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.

The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed.

"You are indeed a man of many talents, but I will still kill you tomorrow. What is your last request."

The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse, alone."

The Chief is curious, but he agrees, and Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent. Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears, looks him square in the eye and says, "Listen carefully, for the last time. I said "BRING POSSE!"

[decoy]

The son of an illegal immigrant asks his dad, "Dad, what's democracy?"
"Well, son, that's when the British work and we get all the benefits from it!"
"But Dad, aren't the British people unhappy about that?"
"They sure are son, but that's called 'racism.'"

and hides lol

[ronaldo]

and one for fiddles

Girlfriend sends a text to her boyfriend . . . . .



Girlfriend sends a text to her boyfriend . . . . .

If you are sleeping send me your dreams !
If you are laughing send me your smile !
If you are crying send me your tear drops !

Bloke replies: On the bog, what do I do?

[decoy]

[ronaldo]

last one today for fiddles


Little Johnny walks into school



Little Johnny walks into school one day to find a substitute in place of his regular teacher.

She says "Hello class, I'm Mrs. Prussy. When you say my name class remember it has an "r" after the first letter"

The entire class says "Hello Mrs. Prussy"

A few days later the regular teacher gets sick again. When Johnny gets to his desk the teacher asks if he remembers what her name is.

Johnny thinks hard and the says to the teacher "I Remember it has an "R" after the first letter, and it had something to do with a pussey, hmmm.... ".

"That's right" she coaxed.

Then after a few seconds Johnny says "Mrs. Crunt?"