Banky
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Dec 15, 2012 19:55:55 GMT
Post by Banky on Dec 15, 2012 19:55:55 GMT
If you were granted three wishes what would you wish for,
Here are my wishes,
1) To have my mother again, 2) To have my health back no more pain, no more suffering, 3) No more hunger and war, and needless dying in this world.
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Deleted
Joined:January 1970
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Last Online Jun 2, 2024 13:42:24 GMT
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Dec 15, 2012 20:01:28 GMT
Post by Deleted on Dec 15, 2012 20:01:28 GMT
loads of money, massive dong, three more wishes!
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Ron
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Dec 15, 2012 21:36:29 GMT
Post by Ron on Dec 15, 2012 21:36:29 GMT
A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders.
The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich, 'What's yours?'
'I'll have the same,' says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order 'That will be £9.40 please,' and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.
The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke'
The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same.'
Again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.
This becomes routine until the two enter again. 'The usual?' asks the waitress.
'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and a salad,' says the man.
'Same,' says the ostrich.
Shortly the waitress brings the order and says, 'That will be £32.62.'
Once again the man pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table.
The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any longer. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?
'Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a Genie apeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.'
'That's brilliant!' says the waitress. Most people would ask for a million pounds or something, but you'll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live. It's brilliant!'
'That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact amount of money is always there,' says the man.
The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?'
The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My second wish was for a tall chick with a big butt and long legs who agrees with everything I say.'
So I would be very careful on the third wish
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steve386
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Dec 15, 2012 21:45:20 GMT
Post by steve386 on Dec 15, 2012 21:45:20 GMT
loads of money, massive dong, three more wishes! Nearly spat my Tea everywhere then
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Karma
Part Time Staff
Lorraine
No Longer a Vapefest Virgin
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Dec 15, 2012 21:48:51 GMT
Post by Karma on Dec 15, 2012 21:48:51 GMT
I only have one great big massive wish at the moment #fingers#
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OneDay
Super Member
Vaping feeds my body but rock and roll fuels my soul
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Dec 15, 2012 22:22:23 GMT
Post by OneDay on Dec 15, 2012 22:22:23 GMT
A few weeks later a different guy walks into the bar carrying a large box, which he places on the bar. He has a few drinks, the bar livens up, a sing-song starts up in a corner. Eventually the guy opens the box and produces a tiny piano, which he sets on the bar. He then reaches in and takes out a foot-high bloke dressed in tails who sits at the piano and starts to play beautifully, taking requests and everything. People start to ask the obvious questions about where the guy obtained these delights and he told of a genie lamp. He finished his story by complaining that the genie was a little deaf, and assuring everyone he did NOT wish for a twelve inch pianist.
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beautycat
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Dec 15, 2012 22:43:31 GMT
Post by beautycat on Dec 15, 2012 22:43:31 GMT
I only have one great big massive wish at the moment Hope whatever it is, you get it
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alanfinal
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Super Snogger
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Dec 16, 2012 1:38:40 GMT
Post by alanfinal on Dec 16, 2012 1:38:40 GMT
Unreality is good Crystal palace not to fall down the table and win the championship A political party worth voting for hoping that a big dong doesn't matter
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timnowvapes
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Dec 16, 2012 3:58:15 GMT
Post by timnowvapes on Dec 16, 2012 3:58:15 GMT
3 wishes? so difficult, as I could easily do the world peace, everyone happy, no more illness - but that would throw the balance of this world into chaos. So for fun 1) To develop warp drive, worm hole travel and a space ship to travel in 2) My own lovable version of a Penny from TBBT 3) For Aliens to find this planet, take pity on us, and improve our lives for the better without consequence ..........or 1) Thalaron radiation with biogenic properties, able to consume organic matter at the subatomic level to be used for a new guy fawkes attempt 2) for the replacements to have a heart, conciseness, sympathy and empathy with the population and the ability to give people hope, respect and for them to live long and prosper 3) My own lovable version of a Penny from TBBT give up...........to difficult - Penny would be nice though
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Ron
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Dec 16, 2012 16:22:19 GMT
Post by Ron on Dec 16, 2012 16:22:19 GMT
This Penny Tim?Oh forget it
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Banky
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Dec 16, 2012 19:47:32 GMT
Post by Banky on Dec 16, 2012 19:47:32 GMT
A guy and his dog walk into the pub the dog jumps up on the stool next to the guy, the bartender says sorry sir no animals on the seats. The guy says why he can walk, he can talk, so why is he not allowed to have a seat like everyone else the bartender replies have you been drinking sir. The answer was no but I bet you, one full glass of whiskey. The dog can speak and go to the shop and come back with what I tell him to bring the bartender says OK guy sends the dog for a carton of Kings 5 minutes latter dog returns with the cigars. The guy says I bet you again whatever I send him for the dog will bring it to me, OK says the bartender same bet then, the guy says to the dog go get me a newspaper the dog says go get it your f*****g self !
The bartender says i wish i had a dog like that, Larry Grayson shouts im FREE
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Ron
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Dec 18, 2012 10:47:08 GMT
Post by Ron on Dec 18, 2012 10:47:08 GMT
Wasn't that John Inman?
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Banky
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Dec 19, 2012 20:13:57 GMT
Post by Banky on Dec 19, 2012 20:13:57 GMT
Your right redron my mistake
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