alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 21, 2012 5:19:10 GMT
As it happens I have brought my daughter up the way I chose , she didn't have a single day off school (that I'm aware of) she didn't skive unlike me , she studied at college and went on to university to study graphic design , she now works in graphic design , and she was brought up with my ideologies , I never pushed my thoughts on her and never pushed her to do well , I advised her to do her best and make her own choices , if she skipped a class , I didn't know and it didn't show . That's great, happy to hear that, I bet you're really proud, and so you should be  That was a point we've been discussing storm, it's whatever works for each child, because they're all different, some will never need disciplining, some will need a lot. One thing works on one child, but not on another. We weren't blasting the OP, we were inputting our opinions, and our ideas of what works with our own children. |
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 21, 2012 5:00:22 GMT
Erm, yes quite frankly, a lot of people who leave school without an education do end up on that path, I didn't say everyone does, just like not everyone is going to end up like Lord Al. I've personally seen it happen hundreds of times. Leave school, can't get a job, get bored, end up taking drugs, or committing crime for money, it happens.
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 22:24:06 GMT
Way to go. I love kids  same here, couldn't eat a whole one though, congrats Lil, don't spoil him mind   Congrats Lil, 1 more to spoil is always a good thing... especially when you get to hand them back at the end of the day |
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 21:07:29 GMT
Haha voted visions, as they were the only thing that wasn't around when I started, to my knowledge.
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 20:37:09 GMT
No, I don't think I am, this is a discussion forum, so everyone who has posted in this thread, was discussing the topic, to me, that is exactly the point of a discussion forum. ???
Although I agree, she does not need dragging over the coals, and I don't think she has been.
As for the A.Sugar and Branson reference, I wonder how many people start skiving school, make a habbit of it, leave with barely an education, turn to drugs, and end up washed up?
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 19:33:20 GMT
After reading this thread I think some people have really missed the point and have got themselves stuck up their own arses about right and wrong , I think we all agree that kids should get a good education , ( please don't get me started on the quality of said education ) however the op as she has said is sharing her personal thoughts with us , and not the child in question , did we all lose our sense of humour when we grew into "adults" or do we have to lambast everyone who shares a personal funny moment ! Rant over Good on ya Rosy gal As is everyone else! Rant over! |
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 18:09:26 GMT
They'll be 8 and 9 in June Anne, they really are quite good tbh, almost feel guilty having this discussion, as I don't think I'll ever need to punish them for truancy... Although things can change.
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 18:07:57 GMT
PMSL bob got knocked out by a pea... My mum always said that vegetables make you strong.
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 18:02:33 GMT
I've probably come across as really strict here, but the truth of the matter is I'm blessed, at the moment my kids are really well behaved, and I rarely have to tell them off, never mind discipline them. I can't remember the last time they did anything really naughty, they can be a little cheeky now and then, and they get a verbal for that, often reluctant to go to bed, and again they soon move when I tell them to in a sterner voice, but nothing to write home about. I guess I've got it all to come yet  EDIT: I meant to put "compared to how I was" |
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 17:26:53 GMT
I know rosy, you are right, but hopefully having a healthy relationship with them, disciplining them whilst young, and guiding them to the best of my abilities, will mean I wont have to discipline them too much when they get older. If it doesn't work out like that, which is probably most likely, then I'll carry on disciplining them in whatever way I think is right at the time. For the record, if I thought they deserved it, and that it would teach them a lesson when they get older, I would not hesitate to give them a good slap, despite what the government may say, and despite what others may think. TBH though, I don't think it will work with mine when they get older, they're like me, would rather take a few seconds of pain, than days of misery being bored. #icon_rofl#
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 16:55:15 GMT
Thanks for that Anne,only someone who has been there can understand why i am proud of her.Makes it worse as she has hit puberty ??? No problem Alvo,you have an opinon as we all have but i really am intersted in what you would do to punish your children if you had too.Sorry if that came across as flippant before but i was dashing off.As we cannot smack kids anymore(doesnt work on older kids anyway),cant keep them in too long etc,what are you left with? And you are right,i am wise,lol Mostly I'd stop them doing things they like, playing out, going to clubs (girl guides etc) Take there favourite toys off them... basically deprive them of any luxury or fun, particularly the things they enjoy the most, a little technique a friend taught me years ago, and it works. I have to stand by the decision once I've set the punishment, if I ever backed down, and gave in to them, let them out or have their stuff back early, it would be counter productive. But every child is different, different things work for different kids, you have to find what works for your own. |
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 16:24:21 GMT
Sorry rosylea, I'm not frowning on you, or judging you in any way, I was just joining in with the topic, by saying how I'd like to think I'd handle it. As I said, only you know your family, and only you can decide how to bring them up, I don't mean to sound like I'm telling you how to do it, because firstly I don't think anybody should ever do that, and secondly you're probably a lot wiser than me. For all I know, she could be a really quiet shy type, that could do with coming out of her shell a little, I don't know, I was simply talking about me and mine, and I wouldn't let mine get away with it. hope that clears it up  |
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 16:09:20 GMT
It's a tough one Anne, it shouldn't happen, but it does. Is there anybody here who can honestly say that they never, ever got bullied, or even teased at some point? I suspect there may be 1 or 2, but the majority of people will have felt down at some point because of teasing or worse. It's part of growing up, an unnecessary part, but unfortunately still part, kids can be so cruel sometimes. These days though, it is getting worse, it's not just teasing, serious physical harm is caused, sometimes with weapons, and the only thing I can put that down to is a drop in discipline.
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alvoram
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 15:53:45 GMT
I agree with that Anne, Like I say, if I catch them. I thought you were also going to raise the point that just because you "skive off" a few times, it doesn't mean it will lead to anything worse, as that would be correct, but there is a chance that it can, a chance I wouldn't willingly take.
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Post by alvoram on Apr 20, 2012 15:39:56 GMT
Had a feeling it was, was going to include a laughing smiley, but didn't want to look like an idiot, (should that be "even more like an idiot?") if indeed there was a new product coming called the click.
#icon_rofl# #icon_rofl# #icon_rofl#
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