I've been sent outside.

[Mikey@Vaporized]

This might turn in to a bit of a rant... I will try and stay on topic and not get too emotionally charged but to say I am p***ed off is an understatement.
To make a long story short, I switched from cigs to vaping for the benefit of my newborn son. Granted the health benefits for me are fantastic and after making the switch I don't think I could go back to the fags.
In the lead up to my son being born I had already switched. There was a bit of debate between me and the OH about whether I should be doing it in the house obviously with me in the yes camp, her in the no camp. She is an ex smoker but just smoked socially, quit cold turkey and quickly turned anti cig. I have carried on vaping in the house until earlier this eve.
Today on the way home, in the middle of a long journey I stealth vaped in the car while driving. Nothing mental, a few quick puffs to see me through. I think I did this twice. No clouds or anythin mad, just a quick few deep draws. A few things were said, I got the blunt end of a tired and stressed mother, and the end result is I am now vaping outside. She's "not convinced that it's beneficial for her health".
I have tried to explain I'm making no claim for it to be, just certain that it is not harming her or my son, and if it is on any level, no where close to exhaust fumes when he is out for a walk, smoke being produced from frying food etc. I have researched a lot for my own peace of mind before vaping in the house as naturally I have no intention to harm anyone and if it were harmful in any way, I would happily take it outside.
Right now though I have to admit I amn't at all happy about it. I made these changes for my son with his health and well being in mind. Now I feel like I am being ostracised the same way as a smoker. It's like I am one all over again and it doesn't feel good.
I think I have been reasonable by way of compromise; II don't vape in the same room as my son - only the kitchen usually because we don't have him in there much. I try not to vape in the car often if he is in the back, just the occasional puff when I feel I need it. I keep all my liquids and equipment well out of the way and always keep up to date with what's going on science wise in relation.
I am just getting hassle for it now though, it makes me think what is the point? She has little to no knowledge about vaping, only that which I have shared (which she listens to begrudgingly). She is stubborn to find out for herself and doesn't think she needs to justify her requests.
I have challenged her to find me some legitimate research that would give me a reason not to vape inside ie proof of harm. She is not interested at all in looking at any of what I can show her that says otherwise. Part of me feels like she is jealous that I have a new hobby and spend half an hour of my day on forums (others aswell though not ECIG related). Also I think she may still relate it to smoking and fails to see the difference despite my attempts to make it clear. Like I say, I feel like a smoker all over again.
Am I being unreasonable or unfair in anyway? (ladies your help would be good here!) Seriously, I have tried all approaches but I'm at the point now where I'm seething. Absolutely livid! The reason why - I am in bed writing this. To go for just a couple quick puffs of my ECIG requires me to get fully clothed, go out in the pissing rain just to come back in cold, wet, get undressed again and get comfy just to do the same in another half hour. And again, and again, and again. As you can imagine it will be a long night. I think I'm perfectly justified, based on the efforts I've made to fully understand the habit and any potential harm, to vape inside. Some other opinions would be good though, and any suggestions of ways around this without getting into big arguments about it would also be very helpful. Anyone else come up against this?

If you have read this all, well done and apologies for the rant! No one to talk to about it though. My son listens to me but at 4 weeks he doesn't have a lot to say back

[Fagsareus]

Mikey@Vaporized put it down
to hormonal imbalance ...is there anyone else perhaps influencing her in her recent decision who is anti-vape ....?

[VapingBad]

Mikey@Vaporized I don't think you are being unreasonable and unfortunately don't have any solution, unless you had a vape friendly health professional that would reassure your wife. She (you both) have so much on your plate with a newborn to look after and I think you will just have to give her time as the negative press has left many with concerns. As great a vaping is, your family are more important and you are lest with the most important benefit to your health even if you have to go out in the rain.

Best wishes to you and your family.

[prr]

Not an expert, but guess this may be down to the flood of hormones after giving birth. Us blokes will never understand the feelings mothers get, our job is to deal with it because they have given us the greatest gift we can ever have, a son or daughter. My advice is live with it and love your child like a lion, regards, Paul. PS I got pissed off as well!

[baggieboy999]

your missus is right mate , shes a woman and there always right . My missus moans at me sometimes when I'm vaping 80vg 20pg juice at 0.2ohms and she can't see who's murdering who in eastenders so I just chill in the bedroom on xbox and have a can while see watches them. But tbh my missus just loves how the house smells of flavours now instead of stale smoke.

And iv'e got 2 kids 11 and 8 , and tbh I dread to think what this country will be like when there 18 so don't i worry about vaping around them

[Mikey@Vaporized]

Jun 1, 2014 22:19:55 GMT Fagsareus said:

Mikey@Vaporized put it down
to hormonal imbalance ...is there anyone else perhaps influencing her in her recent decision who is anti-vape ....?

Yeah, besides my mum who I have semi converted, basically my whole family. They are both stubborn and uneducated about anything vape related. Also my dad prefers if I don't do it in his house as its a bad influence for my kid bro. She's sees this as being the same as asking me not to do it in my own home...

[silentscream]

You're not being unreasonable at all but I don't know what to suggest. All my family members and friends have been hugely supportive and are happy I am no longer smoking.

The only way around this is for her to find out how harmless vaping is but she doesn't seem to be very receptive. I'd wait till she's in a good mood then take her out to dinner if you can find a babysitter you trust and talk to her about it.

Best of luck mate it sounds like a bloody nightmare, I hope you get it sorted.

[Mikey@Vaporized]

Jun 1, 2014 22:22:39 GMT VapingBad said:

Mikey@Vaporized I don't think you are being unreasonable and unfortunately don't have any solution, unless you had a vape friendly health professional that would reassure your wife. She (you both) have so much on your plate with a newborn to look after and I think you will just have to give her time as the negative press has left many with concerns. As great a vaping is, your family are more important and you are lest with the most important benefit to your health even if you have to go out in the rain.

Best wishes to you and your family.

I know they are more important, definitely. Way more important than vaping. That said it's an addiction so most will empathise with my need for nicotine getting in the way of other things Just a pain in the ass going in and out to swap tanks, fix a gurgle, get a charged battery cos my one in use dies etc. I can't go out and use it like a cig as I use it much more frequently. She doesn't really see the difference or understand that by pushing me outside she is making it harder. I am gonna be out that door every 20-25 mins every day for the foreseeable future. Next thing will probably be getting shit for how much I go outside. Then I'll have to cut down to save arguments.
Just generally feel upset about the whole thing, vaping has been working so well since I started 03/03/14. My only successful attempt at stopping fags in 11 years, after 6 or so years of trying. I vape very frequently to keep my cravings at bay though. Already with less nic I am feeling ratty, defensive, argumentative. I haven't really tested the water of going for long periods without a vape but I can't imagine it would do any of us any good right now.

[Mikey@Vaporized]

Jun 1, 2014 22:37:11 GMT prr said:

Not an expert, but guess this may be down to the flood of hormones after giving birth. Us blokes will never understand the feelings mothers get, our job is to deal with it because they have given us the greatest gift we can ever have, a son or daughter. My advice is live with it and love your child like a lion, regards, Paul. PS I got pissed off as well!

It definitely is. It only seems to be a problem when she is stressed. She makes me feel guilty about it though, like I'm betraying her by not listening to her wishes. Basically she just sees it as inconsiderate, which is so frustrating when I made the choice mainly out of consideration for both my child and her. I did it because it was entirely considerate and beneficial for them both to not be around smoke (even though I smoked outside) and I wouldnt influence my son to smoke as my mum did me. As I've said the benefits for me are great but if we weren't ever having a child, I'd have carried on smoking. So in that regard, that's the most annoying part of it all. Smoke or vape, I can't win whichever I do.

[VapingBad]

Mikey@Vaporized I really sympathise with you, your situation really sucks, the hole anti vaping ignorance thing angers me & that's not personal or effecting me at home. Might be helpful to get some higher nic juice to help with the frequency of your cravings. It was a much better thing to do to come here and "rant" as you put it (I'd say vent) than bottle it up.

All this is because of the rabid anti-tabbacco lobby spreading scare stories and constantly saying "we don't know the long term risks" every other sentence. It get regurgitated by authority figures and the press and has given lots of nice, normal and intelligent people a distorted view. Blame these b@stards for your wife's opinion.

Good luck mate, you shouldn't have to deal with this

[Q]

I'm going to put the cat amongst the pigeons and agree with your wife!!!

Did you smoke cigarettes in the car with your wife on board? probably not, she's gone cold turkey and you should be proud of her for that, we gave up smoling but STILL carry out very similar actions, and we're probably STILL addicted... to vaping.

My wife has never touched a cigarette in her life, I never smoked in her company, and certainly never in the house, since I've been vaping I DO vape indoors but NEVER in the same room as her, and would never dream of vaping in the car whilst she's there.

Just be proud of your new son (congratulations by the way) and realise that you have made this sacrifice for HIM, perhaps your wife will relent and a quick stealth vape in another room might be deemed OK but take it slowly, if you hadn't done it in the car this situation would probably not have happened

[silentscream]

Jun 2, 2014 0:10:54 GMT Q said:

I'm going to put the cat amongst the pigeons and agree with your wife!!!

Did you smoke cigarettes in the car with your wife on board? probably not, she's gone cold turkey and you should be proud of her for that, we gave up smoling but STILL carry out very similar actions, and we're probably STILL addicted... to vaping.

My wife has never touched a cigarette in her life, I never smoked in her company, and certainly never in the house, since I've been vaping I DO vape indoors but NEVER in the same room as her, and would never dream of vaping in the car whilst she's there.

Just be proud of your new son (congratulations by the way) and realise that you have made this sacrifice for HIM, perhaps your wife will relent and a quick stealth vape in another room might be deemed OK but take it slowly, if you hadn't done it in the car this situation would probably not have happened

So you don't vape in the same room as her and would never vape in the car while she's there clearly you are concerned vaping is harming people around you what are you basing this on?

[Q]

Not for that reason at all, purely that she doesn't like it & I respect that

[Debbie13]

A females point of view.....not that its going to help you in any way. Our daughter is 19 this year....we both smoked back then but outside away from her.
I duel fuel....meaning smoke and vape.....I smoke at least half less than I used to....hubby stopped all together September last year and has never touched a stinkie since.....he never moans at me for having the odd stinkie.....The only time I moan is when he vapes certain juices in the house....smells horrid but tastes lovely.....but most of the time it makes the house smell nice and I enjoy the smell. I dont vape black jack when he is in either as he hates the smell....
Its give and take.......making you go outside does not seem to be the way to go......
Maybe you could have a mega vape down stairs before you go to bed and not vape in bed.......Hubby doesnt and neither do I smoke or vape in bed....
If the kitchen is the place that your son rarely is taken into then maybe a compromise could work.....

[chykensa]

This is a horrible situation to be put in, and you have my sympathies. I never smoked in the house, and my wife who smokes about 3 cigs a day, always smokes outside.
I am allowed to vape in the house, and I make sure that I don't push things too far when I'm in the same room as the OH otherwise it would be back to vaping outside. It IS a compromise, and you need to pick your moment and explain to her again what you have said about giving up smoking for the health of the whole family. Softly, softly, catchee monkey - go with the flow for a couple of weeks, then try the odd stealth vape inside but not in the same room. Experiment with stronger nic juices to counteract the cravings, and definitely don't vape in the car with her or your wonderful son!
I think things should work out over a period of time, but just see if you can be sensitive to your wife's requests, don't push things, and make sure you explain your side of things when the mood is calm and not besieged by hormones