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It's been said before, but what a great bunch of people we have in this place

Me first 

Ever regretted something that could turn nasty

Blatantly nicked from another (unrelated) forum...


After much research a woman puts her beloved mum in a nursing home for the first time. On her first day, the old lady is sitting in a comfortable armchair admiring the beautiful view from the french windows. Suddenly she begins to lean over to the left, but the attentive staff rush to her and straighten her back up. Soon after she leans over to the right, but again the staff immediately straighten her up. This happens a number of times throughout the afternoon.

Later that day the daughter comes to visit and asks her mum about the home. "Oh it's absolutely wonderful" says the old lady. "But there is one thing I don't like about the staff". "What's that?" asks the daughter, worriedly.

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"They won't let me fart" replied the old lady.

She's pretty, got brains, and far too dangerous for some unsuspecting suitor.

Can you imagine if he forgot the milk on his way home, he'd be hung, drawn and quartered.

God love her, she'll make her way in this world.

I wish

It would be like something out of a James Bond movie, with Bond hunting down this global meglomaniac... infiltrating Trump Towers and discovering secret tunnels in the basement leading to 'who knows where'.

Don't want this to get political (as there is a special place for that) and I've not much time for any of the others on both sides. It's just that the world has become like a fictional comic book, unfortunately the people suffering do not come back to life on page 10

I always remember the predominance of Park Drive when I travelled north of Brum in my youth.

However I started on Woodbines, Guards, Strand (you're never alone) and if I was flush I'd treat myself to Senior Service.

The one I stuck with most in later years was...



which resulted in one of my nicknames at work, cos no-one else had heard of them.

Bet you can't guess where my 'user name' came from on this board

domejunky       

You can't be classed as 'Daan Saaf' until you're asked nearly every day... 'where've yer parked yer tractor?' by these people 'Oop Norf'... love them really