National Census

[Perpetua]

Anyone else had theirs?

Recieved mine today and it's 32 pages long!

You can do it online though.

www.census.gov.uk/

[tony2stix]

Yes had mine through today aswell my wife said you can't send them back before 20 something of March, it will take us that long to fill it bloody in LOL

[Perpetua]

Lol Tony! It's quite a volume isn't it!

Just completed it online and it wasn't too bad at all, infact a lot easier than trying to figure out the hard copy version!

[Chrissie]

No, not got mine yet.

[Scylla]

Got mine Don't know what to do about bro, whom I deny the existence of on the electoral register cos he's not here with my consent

SO is ranting about the blerdy govt and privacy, lack of, and what business is his religion of theirs? I have to get it in the neck!

scylla

[Perpetua]

Tricky one Scylla, as it's a legal obligation . . . and it wouldn't surprise me if the information is shared amongst other Government organisations.

[lynwlt]

Scylla,
I suppose his being there could affect your council tax...
I don't suppose that the "powers that be" would recognise your reasons for not declaring him.
I don't know what I would do.
I believe the Census people do random home visits to confrim the validity of the information they have been given on the forms. If you choose not to declare him, then tell him not to answer the door to anyone for at least a year!!

Lynda

[hissie]

Yup mine arrived & I'm disgusted with the amount of info they are asking for.

Scylla, I wouldn't declare him living with you to be honest. If anything comes of it, just say he moved in after the census form was completed.

There's ways round most things, but don't say I told you

[AndnAnge]

Big brother...is not only watching but wanting

[Perpetua]

It very much feels that way And, no matter how it's dressed up.

[Hanow]

I have yet to do mine - think a large pot of coffee - no, scrap that idea - large bottle of wine - may be required before I sit down to do it.

The passport application joke comes to mind here. Am sure most of you have seen and read it, but it still makes me laugh - and so blummin true - and I know how he feels, because I have just had to go through a similar process re: a temporary job I am currently doing. Just to get on to the County payroll, I have had to submit 3 different forms to three different people - with much of what is asked for on one form needing to be replicated on the others. Then ......... and evident from the address to where I have to send them, these three different people are are actually in the same room at County Hall!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Three forms, three envelopes, three stamps, all going to the same place/room!

Anyway, for those who haven't seen the passport application - here 'tis:

Dear Minister,
I’m in the process of renewing my passport but I am a total loss to understand or believe the hoops I am being asked to jump through.

How is it that Bert Smith of T.V. Rentals Basingstoke has my address and telephone number and knows that I bought a satellite dish from them back in 1994, and yet, the Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date?

How come that nice West African immigrant chappy who comes round every Thursday night with his DVD rentals van can tell me every film or video I have had out since he started his business up eleven years ago, yet you still want me to remind you of my last three jobs, two of which were with contractors working for the government?

How come the T.V. detector van can tell if my T.V. is on, what channel I am watching and whether I have paid my licence or not, and yet if I win the government run lottery they have no idea I have won or where I am and will keep the bloody money to themselves if I fail to claim in good time. Do you people do this by hand?

You have my birth date on numerous files you hold on me, including the one with all the income tax forms I’ve filed for the past 30-odd years. It’s on my health insurance card, my driver’s licence, on the last four passports I’ve had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I’ve had to fill out before being allowed off the planes and boats over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms that are done every ten years and the electoral registration forms I have to complete, by law, every time our lords and masters are up for re-election.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, I was born in Maidenhead on the 4th of March 1957, my mother’s name is Mary, her maiden name was Reynolds, my father’s name is Robert, and I’d be absolutely astounded if that ever changed between now and the day I die!

I apologise Minister. I’m obviously not myself this morning. But between you and me, I have simply had enough! You mail the application to my house, then you ask me for my address. What is going on? Do you have a gang of Neanderthals working there? Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don’t want to activate the Fifth Reich for God’s sake! I just want to go and park my weary backside on a sunny, sandy beach for a couple of week’s well-earned rest away from all this crap.

Well, I have to go now, because I have to go to back to Salisbury and get another copy of my birth certificate because you lost the last one. AND to the tune of 60 quid! What a racket THAT is!! Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day? But nooooo, that’d be too damn easy and maybe make sense. You’d rather have us running all over the place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find some tosser to confirm that it’s really me on the goddamn picture – you know… the one where we’re not allowed to smile in in case we look as if we are enjoying the process! Hey, you know why we can’t smile? ‘Cause we’re totally jacked off!

I served in the armed forces for more than 25 years including over ten years at the Ministry of Defence in London. I have had security clearances which allowed me to sit in the Cabinet Office, five seats away from the Prime Minister while he was being briefed on the first Gulf War and I have been doing volunteer work for the British Red Cross ever since I left the Services. However, I have to get someone ‘important’ to verify who I am — you know, someone like my doctor… who, before he got his medical degree 6 months ago WAS LIVING IN PAKISTAN…

Yours sincerely,
An Irate British Citizen.

[Scylla]

Lol, Hanow, that's a good one! I'm dreading doing this census form

scylla

[Chrissie]

Lol Hanow, I wonder if whoever wrote that did eventually get their passport renewed?

Got my Census a couple of days ago & found it fairly easy to complete. Going to submit it online nearer to the 27th.

[magicma]

Yep, had mine a couple of weeks ago. I think I will do it on line. If I mess it up it's cos I'm old!! MM

[deesigner]

After much ranting and raving, I filled mine in on the day I received it (about 10 days before it was due) my religion is now officially Jedi