The Humourous Thread

[jaki]

Scylla, I keep coming back to your letter from Edna, now shamelessly posted on a number of other forums. My 17 year old was in tears when he read it. Excellent

xx

[Scylla]

I'll have to tell my ex-kinda-sister-in-law, who sent it to me - she'll be thrilled to have given so much pleasure

scylla

[jimmybat]

106 big sleeps till Christmas

[Scylla]

[hmv]

IMO this banter really should be in this section!

The Humorous Thread ....

Sept 9, 2010 21:27:51 GMT @lisaf01 said:

A lot of the Joye atties (The titan is a Joye510) have been coming with a LOT of primer recently.
You will not get decent vapour until all of that is blown out and proper e-liquid applied to the atomiser.
Don't drip it on a burn it off though, doing that tends to stress the atty as it needs the airflow of the user sucking on it whilst it's activated.
Once you've cleared the primer and dripped a couple of drops directly into the atomiser, you should see decent vapour production.

Sept 11, 2010 5:02:37 GMT jimmybat said:

In other words it will work better after it has had a blow ?

Hmm need to tell the wife

Lov ya

james

Sept 11, 2010 13:06:37 GMT Hanow said:

Scylla - less praise for that Perpy, please. It will go to her head - and she will become totally unmanageable. >

James - in your dreams hun, espcially if you haven't yet moved beyond: 'Are yer awake?'

Sept 11, 2010 17:40:20 GMT jimmybat said:

there was absolutely o need for that Hanow ....what makes you think that MY WIFE .... WHO LOVES ME...... would not blow my atties out for me ....she loves when they are tasting good and vaping %100
Jamres

LMFAO

[ken]

The Bacon Tree

Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United States , wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says.........

"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I theenk."

"Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. "

With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.

There's raw bacon, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon ... every imaginable kind of cured pork.

"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Ees a bacon tree."

"Luis, maybe ees a meerage? We ees in the desert don't forget."

"Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smell like bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree."

And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis drops like a wet sock. Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe with his dying breath,

"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!"

"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees it? "

"Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree. Ees


Ees


Ees


Ees



Ees a ham bush.....

[Scylla]

ROFL, Kenny

scylla x

[Lilac]

lolololol

[profbeard]

The Pope is in the US and is getting fed up with the people like aides and security that constantly surround him.

He says - "I want some time to myself". An aide says - "the President has put a private car at your disposal with a highly trusted driver - why not go for a drive around and chill out?"

So the Pope is in the back of this nice car (with blacked out windows in the rear section) and he says to the driver _ "This is a Jaguar isn't it? - I always wanted to drive a Jaguar - can I have a go?"

So the Pope gets in the front and the driver gets in the back...

The Pope is a bit over-enthusiatic and get pulled over by a traffic cop...

"Step out the car please..." the cop say to the Pope.

So the Pope gets out...

"Wait there" says the cop - and phones his Captain at the precinct...

"Look boss" he says, "I think I might have stopped someone really important..."

"Not the mayor again!" says the Captain

"More important than the mayor!" says the cop

"oh no! Not the President!!!" says the Captain

"More important than that!" says the cop

"More important than the President! Who is it for ****'s sake?"

"I don't know" says the cop, "but you won't believe who his driver is!!!!!!"

[ken]

I really like this one Prof lol. Had me in stitches.

Ken.

[Scylla]

Lovely punch line, Prof

scylla

[ken]

Two builders (Dave and Stuart) are seated either side of a table in a pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a stool at the bar.

The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the suit

Dave: - I reckon he's an accountant.

Stuart: - No way - he's a stockbroker.

Dave: - He ain't no stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here!

The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets the better of Dave and he makes for the toilet.

On entering the toilet he sees that the suit is standing at a urinal.

Curiosity and the several beers get the better of him.

Dave: - 'Scuse me.... no offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering what you do for a living?

Suit: - No offence taken! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession

Dave: - Oh? What's that then?

Suit: - I'll try to explain by example ... Do you have a goldfish at home?

Dave: - Er ... mmm ... well yeah, I do as it happens!

Suit: - Well, it's logical that you keep it either in a bowl or in a

pond. Which is it?

Dave: - It's in a pond!

Suit: - Well it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large garden then?

Dave: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden.

Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that, in this town, if you have a large garden then you have a large house?

Dave: - As it happens I've got a five bedroom house .... built it myself!

Suit: - Well given that you've built a five bedroom house it's logical to assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and that you are quite probably married? And with a family?

Dave: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and four children.

Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually active with your wife on a regular basis?

Dave: - Yep! Five times a week!

Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you don't masturbate very often?

Dave: - Do what? Not me, mate!

Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!

Dave: - How's that then?

Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told you about your sex life!

Dave: - I see! That's pretty impressive. Thanks mate!

Both leave the toilet and Dave returns to his mate.

Stuart: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?

Dave: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!

Stuart: - What's that then?

Dave: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?

Stuart: - Nope

Dave: - Well then, you're a wanker

[Scylla]

[Lilac]

good one

[magicma]

MM